The Intersection of Religious Trauma and Mental Health Support w/ Ashlee Lewis

What does it mean to truly understand the 'why' behind substance use disorders? How does counter-transference play a role in supporting the LGBTQ+ community, especially amid religious trauma? These are just a few of the provocative questions we explore with our esteemed guest, Ashlee Lewis, a devoted mental health professional. We delve into Ashlee's transformative journey from working in substance abuse to specializing in LGBTQ support and perinatal mental health. Her personal experiences, combined with her professional practice, make for a compelling and enlightening conversation that underlines the importance of empathy, self-awareness, and the power of therapy.

Committing to therapy can be life-changing, and Ashlee is a testament to that. Her work at Empowering Therapy Charlotte uses innovative techniques to support her clients. From discussing her journey and how her parent's alcoholism has shaped her professional boundaries, to exploring the intersections of religious trauma and supporting the LGBTQ+ community, Ashlee provides us with a unique perspective on mental health. She also shares the power of online platforms, such as Instagram, in therapy and empowerment. Join us for this insightful episode as Ashlee Lewis guides us through the complexities, challenges, and ultimate triumphs in the field of mental health.

Website: EmpoweringTherapyCharlotte.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EmpoweringTherapyCharlotte
Instagram: https://instagram.com/empoweringtherapycharlotte?

This program is brought to you by:
Kindred Art Therapy
Visit https://www.arttherapync.com/ to schedule a free consultation.
- and -
Alynee Davis, PLLC
Visit https://alynnedavis.com/ to connect.
Alynne is a Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor and Coach.

Be sure to visit BizRadio.US to discover hundreds more engaging conversations, local events and more.

Transcript

Aubrey : 1:01

Welcome to Kindred Conversations, the show where we shine a light on local mental health professionals, who are the unsung heroes of our community. Join us as we delve into their journeys, strategies and the art of healing minds. Together, we'll break down stigmas and celebrate resilience. Today, we are honored to have Ashley Lewis, lcmhca, a dedicated mental health professional based in North Carolina and a graduate of Gardner Web University in 2020. Ashley's journey from substance abuse, such mental health, to specializing in LGBTQ support and perinatal mental health is both inspiring and transformative. Stay tuned as we delve into Ashley's experiences and expertise, exploring the intersection of mental health, lgbtq plus issues and perinatal care. Welcome, ashley hey thank you yeah.

Aubrey : 1:55

So will you tell us more about your journey, from working in substance abuse to specializing in LGBTQ and all of the things? Just share more about your journey and let us get to know you more? Yeah, of course.

Ashlee : 2:12

It kind of was meant to be. I grew up in a household that one of my parents is an alcoholic, so kind of learning about that substance use realm, I guess. Kind of growing up, I actually wanted nothing to do with it. And then, when it came time to find like my practicum and internships in school, the only places I could find that worked with my schedule ended up being substance use facilities. So I kind of just stumbled into it and kind of gave in like okay, we'll work with this.

Ashlee : 2:50

I had some really great opportunities within that and I learned a lot of stuff. And after I got licensed, I continued to work in that field for probably close to another year, maybe a little bit less, and then kind of walked away from that and started focusing more on private practice solely just mental health and not really any substance abuse from there, and I've just kind of been there ever since. That was in 2021 when I made that switch. And then I worked with a really great company for a couple of years in their private practice and then I just started my own private practice back in June, which has been really, really exciting. So that's kind of my journey.

Aubrey : 3:42

That is really exciting. Off air we were getting to talk a little bit more about your journey into private practice. But before we dive into that, you had mentioned and you don't have to share specifically like things about which parent or all of that, but like the idea of that you came from exploring your own experiences with mental health through one of your parents with alcoholism, and then going through the journey of learning to become a counselor and all of that like how has that, like what kind of things have you had to navigate through as a result of that experience? Because I know a lot of us as clinicians we do come from backgrounds of dealing with family members that have crossed our boundaries or created unhealthy situations for us that now we're dealing with either forgiveness or resentment or frustration or acceptance or all of these different things that we have to navigate there. I'm wondering how you were able to go through that. What are some things that came up for you in that journey?

Ashlee : 4:56

Yeah, a lot of things came up for me with that. Probably even working through that still is a big part of my life. Growing up and then having to kind of get into that with work too, that's very triggering, a lot of counter-transference and all of that Lots of things with boundaries, like you mentioned for sure were things that I had to work through Also, just trying to understand and figure out the why behind why people struggle with substance use disorders, which I don't know is hard to understand. I guess I don't know that there necessarily is a huge why to that Anyway. So I think that's a big piece of having to. I had to figure those things out and work through that. Like I said, probably still work through it a little bit now too. I totally agree with what you said, that a lot of us as clinicians come from things that have happened in our family or things that we've been through and then kind of bring that with us when we meet with our clients in some ways.

Aubrey : 6:17

Yeah, so, and you had mentioned counter-transference, which for those of us who, those who are listening, will you define that a little bit more? Also, how do you navigate the line? Because there is a line between the counter-transference versus lived experience and skills that are really helpful and applicable to the situation.

Ashlee : 6:42

For sure. Yeah, counter-transference. So basically it's just when something comes up from the client as us, the clinician, the client is reminding us of something. So like, for instance, as the clinician, if I had a client that was very similar to my circumstances, that would bring up some things and would kind of trigger a reaction within me and feelings within me. So kind of dealing with that, I had lots of supervision. I have my own therapist, so I think I also had to be, and continue to have to, be very self-aware as things are coming up. What, being able to recognize that something is coming up for me and that I am bothered by something I am experiencing counter-transference.

Aubrey : 7:35

Yeah. So being able to identify is really helpful in getting to a place of being able to both empathize with the client and help them with what they're going through, while not necessarily bringing your stuff into the mix, but like we're humans, like we're always going to sort of bring your stuff in. So I guess where I'm trying to lead to is like how do you navigate what's more of a healthy line when you know that some of the experiences that you've had can actually help a client?

Ashlee : 8:09

Yeah, you know, I think that's something that I again have to have a lot of self-awareness with, because it there is a line there, but it's sometimes One that isn't necessarily a black and white line. So what I try to ask myself when I have things come up that I think could be potentially helpful for the client. I just asked myself, you know, is this truly for their benefit, or is this me wanting to say something For my that would benefit me rather?

Aubrey : 8:45

than them. Yeah, yeah, that's a tough one, right. That's part of our jobs as as Clinicians. Right is like holding how much do you say, how much do you hold back, right? Mm-hmm, exactly, yeah, yeah. So let's kind of switch gears a little bit. So you talked more about, like this intersection of religious trauma that you've Navigated Longside, supporting those in the LGBTQ plus community. Like how, how did you get into that work and what kind of strategies are you using to help those people?

Ashlee : 9:25

Yeah, I, I love working with the LGBTQ community.

Ashlee : 9:30

This is something that and it goes along with the religious aspect of it.

Ashlee : 9:34

But it's something in my own life that I have had to navigate as someone who grew up in, you know, a very Christian household here in the Bible Belt that you know, you, it it's not a good thing to be within that community, in the LGBTQ community, you know it's all that kind of goes along with that.

Ashlee : 9:56

And as I grew up and, you know, gotten to college and Started seeing things for myself and kind of coming to my own conclusions on things you know, I was able to recognize that I actually am in the queer community as well and having to kind of Figure out how to balance these things that I was taught as a child versus what I know now. And I was, through that, able to kind of recognize that some of the stuff that I was taught, you know just wasn't okay and that I do have some of my own like religious trauma that's coming there and Coming from that and it's kind of lonely. I think a lot of people are affected by it, whether they're within the queer community or whether they're not, and I Don't think that it's talked about all that often, and so I just found it to be something that I'm just really passionate about, which kind of, again, is something that I've Experienced in my own life and just want to be able to help other people with.

Aubrey : 11:00

Hmm, what are some of the things that you've had to navigate through, you know, as as you've shifted mindset, going from being taught certain things growing up Christian to discovering your own queerness, like what are? What are some of those, maybe implicit messages, or even explicit messages that were taught to you that you've had to like program for yourself?

Ashlee : 11:25

Yeah, this could go real deep so I'll try to keep it kind of lighter. I think you know the big one that it stands out is you know it's not okay to be gay or you know Within the LGBTQ community you can get. That's not okay, it's bad, you'll go to hell for that. You know you should love everybody, but that's bad, that kind of thing.

Aubrey : 11:50

Yeah, so now we're where's? I Mean there's kind of like an obvious answer to this. Right, you go from like it's bad to like it's good, it's celebrated, all of that right, but like it's not that simple in the process, right, right, so how do you navigate that?

Ashlee : 12:09

Oh, Lots of therapy, lots of therapy, kind of jumping into the community itself, trying to be more informed, trying to be more active, having friends that are queer. Yeah, a lot of work. I think there was a lot of suppression even after I came to the realization several years ago, and it wasn't until the last couple of years that I've really opened up on it more and really started doing more work with it. So it's definitely a work in progress and it's been fun actually. Yeah.

Aubrey : 13:01

How so? I imagine that for a lot of people, fun wouldn't be the first word that comes to mind.

Ashlee : 13:07

Well, I mean that's fair, and we'll not say that all of it's been fun, because it certainly hasn't been, but I think, just kind of recognizing who I am and recognizing my truth, that's the part that has been fun and very enlightening.

Aubrey : 13:22

So getting to really own your own identity rather than living someone else's truth? Right, yes, exactly yeah. And then earlier you had mentioned boundaries. Does that look like? And I imagine, maybe both of these things but putting distance between you and people, or just telling certain people that they can't say certain things, how does that? What type of boundaries have you had to implement in your own life?

Ashlee : 13:57

Oh, that's a really tough one because I think that very much comes back with family, for the most part because in my personal life, with me and my partner and my family, like that I can be myself and being around people that I can trust and that I love, I can feel a lot safer to be me versus when I'm around more of my family of origin or go back home to my hometown, if you will, if that's not quite the same case. So I Don't know how much of boundaries I put up with that versus maybe masking.

Aubrey : 14:39

still to this point, yeah, I'm asking, you mean like sort of Pretending to just fit in with what they expect as their norm, so that you don't have to deal with the, the ridicule or like the comments that might come If you were to just openly be who you are now.

Ashlee : 15:06

Yeah, yeah, I definitely think to an extent. You know, there's certainly some things, like if family members, excuse me, were to say certain things that were, you know, derogatory or just generally not okay, like I will definitely speak up because I I don't think that that is okay, but I think when it comes more to myself, I'm not necessarily gonna Say as much. Yeah, if that makes sense.

Aubrey : 15:33

Yeah, I'm sorry to. I don't mean to like put you on blast. It's more like I think that these are good conversations to have because, as practitioners, these are things that we've learned and we're navigating as individuals as well. So, like when we're talking to our clients, like I Imagine from a client's perspective, sometimes the things that we're explaining to them, we talk to them, we educate them about like boundaries and and and all of these different things that, like they're probably looking at us like like this is the hardest thing I've ever had to do and I can't believe that you're asking me to do this thing. And the reality is is like we're all humans and we have to do this too, right, so it's.

Ashlee : 16:17

Yeah, yeah, I definitely agree with that.

Aubrey : 16:21

Yeah, and it's hard. It's hard work. It's hard because, like, it's important for our own growth, right.

Ashlee : 16:29

Yeah, and I think it can really come in handy If we're thinking, you know, back to what we share with our clients. You know I Obviously I'm not going in depth into my own stuff with them, but I think it can really Do a lot to say like, hey, I get it. I struggle with setting boundaries too, or I struggle with whatever Because it does help them understand like, okay, they're, they're not this, like all-knowing person, that is great. They, they are human too, kind of like you were saying.

Aubrey : 17:01

Yeah, for sure, like we have to empathize with our clients and also, you know, share the information that we know is going to help them to grow and and Be the best version of themselves. Right, right. So, just within your own practice that you just started, your practice, you're still contracting with a group. How are you managing all of the different, like balls, that are in the air right now?

Ashlee : 17:34

Oh, Goodness, lots of therapy again that is helpful.

Aubrey : 17:42

I know the therapists and their therapy right like, yeah, we take our own medicine.

Ashlee : 17:48

Oh for yes, absolutely yeah. So doing a lot of that, I try to focus a lot on doing self-care stuff, which, you know, it's kind of hit or miss depending on the day or the week I Because, again, I'm just human, but I think I have gotten into a rhythm now With all of it. So it isn't, it isn't quite as bad right now.

Aubrey : 18:15

Okay, well, do tell, share some of your secrets with me, because I need some help.

Ashlee : 18:21

How do?

Aubrey : 18:22

we balance all of these self-care and crazy things that are going on, oh.

Ashlee : 18:27

Oh yeah, I definitely don't have a secret for that. Just trying to take it day by day is kind of where I'm at, and I'm by no means am I good at it, but I am trying to do my best to take it day by day because you know, if you don't that, what? What I always tell my clients if you don't take care of yourself, you can't take care of other people, and you know, it's true.

Aubrey : 18:51

So yeah, so Taking it day by day, is that? Well, my thought when that comes up is, like I can't take things day to day because, like I have to plan things out. I have to plan. Like you know, I, if a client calls me, then I'm gonna schedule them out within the next few weeks or now. Right now I'm scheduling into January because I have a big break coming up, but, like I can't take things day by day, I have to do my schedule. Maybe that's not what you mean, though I think I Mean in a sense.

Ashlee : 19:29

I think so I Get very anxious. So I, on the one hand, I do really like a good plan, I thrive with a good plan, but at the same time if I Look too far into the future it just is not healthy for me. So I think, trying to like pull back a little bit, take it day by day, but at the same time, when necessary, you know, planning things out.

Aubrey : 19:57

So trying to stay in the moment, like each moment, and, you know, maybe breathe through that moment. So are you finding that at times that you're, you find yourself getting overwhelmed and then you're reminding yourself like all I have To worry about is just this, this right here, right right absolutely. Yeah, yeah. Well, I apologize, because I probably contributed to that a little bit before. Before we started this show, we were talking about insurance related stuff with it, which I think is like always an overwhelming topic, right?

Ashlee : 20:32

Oh, for sure, yes, it is but no, it's, it's totally okay because it's something to think about. Yeah, for sure, I mean it's.

Aubrey : 20:42

It's not an easy system for us to navigate, so you know any support that we can give each other through that process. Anyway, right, so I'm share with us more about how we get in touch with you, how the listeners can get in touch with you, ashley, if they want to learn more about your practice and the work that you do with LGBTQ, lgbtq and Perinatal mental health. We didn't even really get to touch on your perinatal mental health experience and, yeah, where do we learn more about that?

Ashlee : 21:21

Yeah, I have a Instagram. That's I, you know I update as I can, so that's at, empowering therapy Charlotte. And then I also have a website. It's Also the same at, or www, whatever empowering therapy charlottecomcom. So I have both of those. I can be reached on either of those. All of my information is on there.

Aubrey : 21:51

Awesome, all right. Well, all of that information is going to be linked to this show and if you like this, then go ahead and to biz radio dot us Be sure to like and subscribe and you can find out more information about me. Avery baptism on art therapy, nc comm. All right.

Ashlee : 22:09

Thanks again, ashley. Yeah, thank you so much, you're welcome.